Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item 6 months ago

My 2 day thought pattern while watching the Today Show.

Day 1: Dec. 19th 2012 - Mood: Giddy

Watching the Today Show and apparently violent video games influence people to commit murder. That makes sense. Everyone knows that Ed Gein was a beast at Mortal Kombat. And before Ronald Defeo murdered his family in the 70's, he had just finished an 8 hour Call of Duty session. Not to mention that playing Nintendo Wii for hours on end is how Lizzie Borden learned those sweet axe swinging moves.

Day 2: Dec. 20th 2012 - Mood: Annoyed

What is it about the media that whenever something horrific happens, they instantly start pointing fingers at everything but the person that caused the tragedy? I was watching the Today show again (because I never learn) and they brought up the connection between violence and video games again, and these people that you would assume to be at least a little intelligent, start saying things like "video games desensitize kids" and "kids lock themselves off in the basement and play a game where the objective is not to harm but to kill, and the line between fantasy and reality distorts". Video games are only a few decades old, violence has been around since THE DAWN OF MAN!! Stop trying to blame everything but the person who is to blame. I love horror movies, violent video games, etc. and I have never harmed anyone. And I'm not desensitized, when I see real life horror, it disturbs me. I can watch a guy get beheaded in a movie and laugh because I know it’s not real. I saw a real video of a guy getting beheaded about 10 years ago, and it haunts me to this day and when I think about it I want to vomit.

If video games were really to blame and there are millions of gamers out there, then why aren’t there millions of these tragedies? Because it is not the games that influences these people, it is just who they are. The only sense I can make out of people who think like these “journalists” do, is that they can’t handle the reality that there are fucked up people in the world and they are going to do fucked up things. These people try to find an explanation to the madness to ease their fears, because people fear what they don’t understand. So ban guns and video games and violent movies so you can lay your head a little easier at night, but when it happens again, and it will happen again, maybe you will point the finger where it belongs: up your stupid asses. Thank you.

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item 8 months ago

Smiley Review

Smiley starts off like many slasher movies do, introduce some random chick in slutty clothing, cue the tense atmosphere of impending doom, add a jump scare or 2, and then end scene with our slasher making a bloody entrance. Right off the bat, this movie uses a tired formula that not only has been done a thousand times before, but has been done a thousand times better before. This is the perfect setup to this movie though. Since the filmmakers used rehashed material borrowed from so many movies before, why make people think that they’re in for something they’re not? But slinging around a tired formula doesn’t necessarily have to mean mediocrity, and someone should’ve told the filmmakers of Smiley that.

Smiley relies on the basics for its story telling. Urban legend + over obnoxious college kids + virgin that no one believes + slasher = horror. This is a formula that we’re all familiar with and one that has worked time and again. The problem is, it didn’t work for Smiley, and here is why. Firstly, the acting was atrocious. I’ve seen better acting on public access cable shows that were more convincing than this cast was. And the overuse of teen slang would make Diablo Cody roll her eyes in disgust. Secondly, where was the suspense? The filmmakers did almost nothing to create a creepy atmosphere, and that is an absolute must in horror films. If you refuse to make the environment scary, how do you expect people to be scared when something actually happens? Turdly, the characters were so one dimensional that I didn’t give a shit if anything happened to them anyway. Whenever someone died at the hands of Smiley I was pretty much relieved, mostly because I knew that I was that much closer to the end of the flick.

Lastly, and this is hands down my biggest problem with the movie, the complete copout of an ending it has. The only way this formula works is if you don’t over complicate things. Take the most iconic slashers to date for example. Michael Myers, Leatherface, Jason Voorhees, Freddy Krueger; all these characters are beloved because they are who they are. These guys kill because that’s who they are and what they do, plain and simple. I don’t want to spoil the end for anybody, but I’ll just say that in the end, there is more time explaining things than time spent on kills during the entire movie. During these explanations, I couldn’t help but feel the filmmakers went the route they did because they don’t have enough faith in the intellect of their audience. So instead of implying the situation, the basically brought in charts and pie graphs and explained everything in a power point presentation. Whatever little bit of intrigue they built into the story of Smiley was completely pissed on with that ending.

In the end, Smiley was a watered down, half assed joke of a horror movie, and even the 4 minutes that Keith David were in it couldn’t make this movie watchable. I could’ve overlooked almost every problem with this flick if they hadn’t overcomplicated that ending. There are a lot of horror movies that are filled with annoying kids and bad acting but are still good because of the main event: the killer. But they took a potentially good thing and completely fucked it up. If I had to make a single analogy with Smiley, I would say it’s like having a friend drop in with a huge bag of juicy cheeseburgers, but as soon as you get excited about them he starts jamming them up his ass while you watch.

My Rating: 3/10 - A little credit goes for casting Keith David, although he was severely under used; Smiley's face which was so badass that it deserved to be in a better flick; and for a small handful of scenes that were fairly decent.

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item about 1 year ago

The return of The Screenshot Game and everything you need to know about it.

So this is how it goes. I post a random screenshot from a random movie, you guess right and you get points. Simple.

I will start by posting an incredibly tough screenshot which will be worth 20 points. The pic might not give very much help to what the movie is, and this is why it's worth the most points. Guess as many times as you want, there is no limit.

After some time passes, like a day or 2, if no one has correctly guessed, I will post a second screenshot from the same movie in which a correct response will net you a still respectable 10 points and the screenshot will be a little more helpful. Again, guess as many times as you want, you've got nothing to lose.

If there is still no correct responses after a day or 2, I will then post the 3rd and final screenshot from the same movie which will be a lot more help in leading you to a correct answer. This will be worth a measly 5 points.

If no one guesses correctly after all is said and done and the 3rd screen has been up for a day or 2, I will then reveal the answer and steal 20 points for stumping everyone. With me so far?

There will be no hints, no help, and at times it will feel like no hope. This game drove many a schmoe to the brink of insanity last year and I'm hoping to have the same reaction this time around. The game has no end, and there is no prize for being in first place. Just a nice heaping bowl of pride and the satisfaction of beating your fellow schmoes. If you're curious as to what the scoreboard looked like last year when the final shot was guessed correctly, here it is:

TheChanges23 - 50 pts.
Nite Owl - 30 pts.
bourahioro - 30 pts.
ElderPredator - 30 pts.
The Bodyguard - 20 pts.
IwishIwasBond - 20 pts.
RandomK1NG - 20 pts.
randychico - 20 pts.
Invidtus - 20 pts.
TheMulderFox - 20 pts.
Tyson J. - 20 pts.
Derek237 - 10 pts.
Sgizzy316 - 10 pts.
KungFu-Mummy - 10 pts.
VitamanMan8 - 5 pts.

As you can see, TheChanges23 kicked some serious ass, and I never managed to stump you guys even once. Like I said, a clean slate so nobody feels like they have to catch up, especially those who weren't around or didn't participate the last time.

As a warning, these shots are going to be tough. Not only will I be posting a lot of movies that weren't hugely popular to the mass public, but the scenes I will be sharing aren't going to be dead giveaways by revealing actors/actresses in them. You will have to rely on sheer memory or dumb luck to win those points. Google cannot help you here. So without further adieu, "The Screenshot Game II: Screeny's Revenge".

Happy Guessing! :)

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

Hi, My Name is Rick, And I Have A Problem.

Thinking back on the last episode of The Walking Dead, I realize Rick may have a problem. When we first met Rick, he took out a little girl walker. When we last saw Rick, he took out a little girl walker. After those barn doors opened during the last episode and a horde of walkers raged out of the barn, Rick just stood there, watching the massacre. Then, as soon as Sophia stepped out, he couldn't get to the front of the firing line fast enough to raise his glock and blast a giant hole right in Sophia's face. Rick my friend, why do you get so much enjoyment out of slaughtering little girl walkers? Why Rick? Why?

Of course this is just a joke and I'm sure that as soon as he saw Sophia, the little girl who caused so much chaos and who Rick had risked life and limb to find, in that one moment, he had a revelation. A revelation that everything the group had been through under his leadership was all for nothing, and he had to question everything he had been so sure about just moments prior. That Shane wasn't crazy, that in fact he was probably the most level headed person in the group who seen things for what they really were. And in that moment, by pulling the trigger, he was killing his perception of the world.

The Walking Dead returns in 4 weeks and 2 days. Bring it.

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

The Horde Movie Review

I love zombie movies, it has always been one of my most beloved genres since I was a kid. But lately, it seems like everybody and their mothers are making zombie flicks, so it's hard to know which are gonna even be worth your time to watch. Luckily, The Horde was one of the better zombie films I've seen in awhile. The events unfold kind of fast and without warning or explanation but that didn't seem to work against the film as much as I expected it to at first.

It starts off as a violent revenge flick with some really intense stuff, then, outta nowhere, quickly does a complete 180 and becomes a zombie flick. That was really my only gripe with the movie, was that it had no hint or build up as to what might've been going on, all of a sudden, it just was. But all in all, the movie was graphic, violent, and full of rampaging zombies that looked really good, fx wise. The story is good, it keeps you knowing that things could erupt at any given moment between the band of survivors and had a somewhat satisfying ending that made it worth the watch. If you like zombies. Which I do.

My Rating: 7/10

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

My 5 Favorite Games of 2011

#5.

L.A. Noire

With it's amazing and innovative face mapping technology and it's classic look, this game was worth playing even if everything else about it sucked, but it didn't. For the first time, we got to play detective and interrogate scumbags and were in complete control of how the story unfolded. Throw in some action play in the traditional Rockstar Games style and some really cool cameos and this game was a complete win.

#4.

Limbo

This is one of the most visually stunning games I've ever played and yet it's nothing but black shadows against a foggy grey background. The game has no dialogue, no back story, no fighting or weapons and yet is completely effective. The story follows a young boy as he enters Limbo to find his sister, it's an old school side scroll game which main features are walking and jumping over obstacles and figuring out puzzles to progress and I had a blast with it. It's one of the most creepy, unsettling games I have ever played and even as short as it is, it still stood out among all the big titles of the year to walk and jump it's way into my top 5 of the year.

#3.

Dead Space 2

Graphic brutality, disgusting creatures, and horrifying situations. This game knew just how to grab my attention. Great controls with the over the shoulder shooting angles made the gameplay extremely smooth and the jump scares just kept on coming. I damn near had a heart attack while playing this game, even when nothing is coming at you or even around, you're completely on edge. You can travel through so many areas and not encounter a single enemy but because of the brilliant sound track, you're heart stays in your throat. There always seemed to be little noises and grunts and growls everywhere and I never knew when something was pop around the corner.

The story was intense and the game pulled no punches with the gore. From the first few minutes of the game I knew what I was in for. The game starts with you traveling through the ship that's being overrun by flesh eating creatures while you're trying to escape while wearing a straight jacket, then as soon as you're freed by another crew member, the dude slits his throat right in front of you. This is all within the first 5 minutes of the game! It grabs you by the balls in the first act and just when you think they're gonna let go, they squeeze a little tighter.

#2.

Infamous 2

Never has a game made me so emotional in all my game playing years. Twice actually. The great thing about this game (as with the first) is that from the start, you get to choose a path with the decisions you are forced to make. Hero or Villain? Are you a man of the people, or greedy sumbitch who's only out for himself? Whichever path you ultimately choose, not only effects the story and the ending, it also effects your powers. Which means 2 full playthroughs of the game means 2 different experiences. That's 2 games for the price of 1! What a steal!

The parkour is one of the most fun things about the game. Climbing up buildings, grinding on power lines, hanging from lamp posts and throwing lightning bolts. It's gameplay is a huge highlight, but that's not all it has to offer. It also has a wide variety of powers to choose from, so many so that you couldn't possibly equip them all at once because the aren't enough buttons on the controller to handle them all!

For me though, the biggest and best thing about this game, is the story. Mainly the ending(s). Both ending are completely heart wrenching, and they both were beautiful in their own right and stuck with me for a long time after. And it's one of few games where I actually watched the credits roll all the way until the end as they recapped some highlights of the game to the haunting tune of "Fade Away" by The Black Heart Procession which was the perfect song to end the game with. (chokes up) I need a minute.

#1.

Batman: Arkham City

I didn't even have to play this game, I could've just watched someone else play it and it still would've been my number 1 pick. But I did play it, and not only is it my favorite game of the year, it quickly became my favorite game of all time. Featuring more villains than you could shake a batarang at, a wide variety of cool gadgets, and a story that would make Christopher Nolan's nipples harden with excitement. Not to mention a surprise ending that would make the biggest fanboy smile ear to ear, and a shitload of kick ass DLC including a wide selection of Batsuits, and 3 extra playable characters in Robin, Catwoman, and Nightwing.

This game had everything you could hope for. Awesome graphics, a terrific score, solid gameplay, and perfect voice over work for every character. Plus an open world for just flying around and finding thugs to beat up, and some really fun challenges for when you wanted a break from the main game, and 440 Riddler challenges for those who enjoy puzzles (like myself). I could play this game all day long, and have. I have zero gripes with this game and one of the biggest travesties is the fact that a game like Skyrim, which is full of yet to be fixed bugs and glitches, can come along and steal all the thunder from this game. Game of the year? Game of the century.

Mood: Chillin'

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

Retreat Movie Review

This was a hell of a mind fuck of a movie. The whole time I was watching I was thinking "something else is going on here" and then I find out it's not, and then a little while later I find out it is, fast forward a few more scenes and I find out it's not again, then by the last act, I find out it was. But when all is revealed, I got the truth that I didn't see coming, and it floored me. That wasn't all, just when you think you know what's real and what's not, boom, another curveball thrown at your temple and you're blinded once again. Then the credits roll and you pick up your jaw and go about your day.

It's a movie that has all the right stuff to stick with you, but because of the pacing and very drab scenery, it's easier to right off after it's over. I enjoyed the flick, but it's one that I know I will never watch again, not because it sucked, it just isn't the kind of movie that warrants a second viewing. Cillian Murphy is one of my favorite actors and he does a decent job as the gullible, nervous man of the house Martin. Thandie Newton does well in her role too, but I think the standout of this one is the very intense Jamie Bell, who completely steals the show.

Retreat was worth the watch as it doesn't demand too much with it's 86 minute runtime, puts on a good show of going back and forth of what's really happening and what's bullshit, kicks you in the nuts with its finale and then escapes your mind until you see it on the shelf at Best Buy years later when you ask yourself "Did I see this? Yes, I remember, I did. I think.".

My Rating: 7/10

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

This Blog Is Not For Women

I can't stand that stupid ass Dr. Pepper 10 commercial. "It's got 10 manly calories". Since when is 10 calories manly? That's a figure watching amount as far as I'm concerned, which isn't exactly manly. If a soda company is pushing a "manly" drink, then without knowing the product I would assume it's made out of bacon grease and motor oil and has a picture of exposed breasts on the label that says "soda" in fine print under the boobies. And under the nutrition facts it would have a picture of Samuel L. Jackson with a caption that read "Stop counting calories Mother Fucker!".

"It's not for women!". Isn't diet soda usually a woman's drink? Don't get me wrong, I switch back on forth from diet to regular all the time, but diet soda is usually the soda of choice for women. And 10 calories is without a doubt a diet soda whether or not it says so on the label.

"Catchphrase!" I got a catchphrase for ya, how about "I'm a fucktard!" followed by a wink and a thumbs up? If that's not manly enough then maybe after you put your thumb out it could get roundhouse kicked off your hand by Chuck Norris and then explode in mid air. Just a thought.

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

Alice: Madness Returns Video Game Review

I'll start by saying I love platform video games, it's probably my favorite genre. Platformers are what keeps the old school video game experience alive and kicking. Alice is definitely a platformer, and with most platformers, it's hard to be too original in terms of gameplay and controls. So off the bat, this isn't a very innovative video game.

The Look: American McGee's version of Wonderland is creepy, twisted, and beautiful; so the look of the game is incredible. It leaves a little more to be desired because the graphics don't fully do the world justice, but the graphics are still pretty good and the cutscenes are actually done in like a paper, marionette style and is the highlight of the game graphic wise.

Alice has a variety of sleek looking gothic style dresses that change after each chapter so the look of the main character doesn't become dull, and you can also change the dress from the main menu to equip either which one you think looks best or to reap the rewards of any dress as they all have different added playthrough bonuses that can help along the way.

Gameplay: You pretty much get the standard platform gameplay and could easily compare its style with the likes of God of War, Darksiders, Dante's Inferno, etc. so nothing new here. The controls feel sloppy at times though, and this was my biggest gripe with the game. At times, the dodge prompt don't wanna work and when it does, it's hard to control the direction you wanna go in as the game kind of takes on a mind of its own and can and will put you in places you don't wanna be in.

I had a lot of trouble with the depth perception of the game. There is a lot of jumping from one landing to another and it's hard to tell sometimes just where you're going to land, so expect a lot of falling to your doom. And don't expect the camera to do the work for you, especially when locking onto your target, cuz sometimes the game makes it very hard to give you a good view to see the things you need to see. Also, the automatic targeting system sucks ass. When you have a huge flood of enemies coming at you, the auto target always seems to point at the smallest, least threatening enemy. And a lot of times these enemies will keep re-spawning until you defeat the head honcho so it's pointless to kill them first. The controls were without a doubt the most frustrating aspect of the game.

Another issue I have is diversity. It just seemed like I was constantly fighting the same enemies over and over again. And that would be fine if the game featured either cool weapons or combos but instead have neither. The weapons can be upgraded but unfortunately they don't tell you what you're getting with your upgrade other than a sleeker looking weapon. I actually found myself using the 2 firing weapons through the whole game and only breaking out my melee weapons on a rare occasion. The firing weapons just seemed more efficient and makes the melee weapons obsolete.

Storyline: The story was cool. This is a twisted world and as such has a twisted storyline. Madness Returns is a perfect title for the game because essentially, that's what the story is, a journey into madness. There are times where I kinda zoned out with some of the side story but the main story was definitely interesting and for me, it was the highlight of the game. Especially when things started unraveling more towards the end and the story started to really reveal itself.

Music: The music was cool, it was very creepy with its low tones and screechy violins and fits the game, as Cheshire Cat would say, Purrr-fect.

Final Thought: Alice Madness Returns is ultimately a good game. I enjoyed playing it for the most part but I was honestly glad when it was over. I have my many gripes with it and when I think about it I remember the frustration very clearly, but all in all, it was worth the playthrough, if only for the story and the look of the game alone.

My Rating: 6.5/10

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

My Top 15 Movies of 2011

15. Stake Land
14. Priest
13. Horrible Bosses
12. Super
11. Source Code
10. Super 8
9. Bridesmaids
8. Paul
7. I Saw the Devil
6. Thor
5. Attack the Block
4. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II
3. Rise of the Planet of the Apes
2. X-Men: First Class
1. Insidious

There were a few that I felt bad for leaving off (Capt. America to name one) but ultimately these were the 15 I either enjoyed, or was impressed with the most throughout the year. The Innkeepers would've made my top 10 for sure but since it technically isn't getting a wide release until this year and was only available On Demand for 2 days of 2011 and the fact that I seen in it 2012, it has to wait til next year, and it's got a lot to contend with for sure. There was also quite a few big films that I missed too (Sherlock, Hugo, Tintin, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, etc.) so this is just a rough copy I guess. Either way, 2011 didn't look like much going into it but ended up being better than I expected. Here's hoping 2012 is even better.

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Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

Read This or Go to Hell!!!

Anybody who knows me knows I am not a man of god, I do not believe in a religion, and honestly don’t believe there IS a god. I do however, find the mythology of God, Jesus, Satan, Heaven, Hell, etc. to be the most fascinating bedtime story ever told. I know a bit about it all and am always up for a good debate about it, if you’re one of the few who actually know what they’re talking about and not just a hypocrite. See, in my eyes, there are 2 types of believers: The hardcore bible thumpers who could quote you scripture right off the top of their head without even thinking about it. They will damn you themselves if you’re not a believer and will probably stab your ass if they think it’s what God wants.

Then there are my favorite people, the hypocrites. The people that will swear up and down that they believe in God and have accepted Jesus Christ as their lord and savior but when you talk to them you realize they really have no clue what they’re saying. These are the people that not only credit God when something happens that they don’t understand, usually hailed as a “miracle”, and believe that they got a golden ticket to heaven because they are “genuinely a good person and God knows that”. These are people who lie, cheat, steal and take God’s name in vain every single day and don’t think twice about atoning for their sins. But “God knows I mean well, and he knows the righteous from the wicked”. Really? Have you read the bible? Or did you just skim it? Because the god depicted in the bible is an asshole.

God as he is depicted in the bible is a spiteful, vengeful god. Stricter than you could possibly imagine, his word is law, and if you don’t follow, you are the damned. And with this god, THE God, it is simply not enough to follow or believe. The bible says that, and I’m paraphrasing here: “Man will be judged by his works, not his faith.” Which basically means you can believe all you want, but if you’re not working for God, doing his deeds, spreading his word, you are not a man of god and will be denied into heaven. “God will smite the wicked, he will strike down with great vengeance and furious anger”. This is the god that everyone seems to agree on that we should pray to and thank every day? This is who you credit for not falling down the steps or spilling your morning coffee? Seriously? Excuse my French but you’re fucking delusional!

There’s a religious group called B'nai Nephilim, which translates to “the sons of the fallen”. These people actually believe that Lucifer is in fact God and that the god that the mainstream prays to is actually the Devil. Think about this for a minute. I’m not condoning any beliefs by any group and definitely am not a “Satanist”, but this makes sense to me. People seem to follow blindly and not question their beliefs, but these people did and this is the conclusion they came to, and I respect that. I still they’re misguided like everybody else, but I respect that they didn’t follow what they’re told to believe at such a young age and they had half the mind to stand up and start looking at things from another perspective. And if you know anything about the mythology about it all, then this should make sense to you too. Lucifer was an angel who stood up to God and disagreed with how he was doing things, and he was banished from heaven for it. So what does anybody do when they’re kicked out of the cool club? They start a cooler club, with booze, floozies, and gambling. So to speak.

Does anybody really know the story of Jesus? Many people just assume it’s a real story but the facts are that this is possibly more fabricated than real. Ever heard of the Egyptian god, Horus? Probably not, so let me break it down for you. By the time stories of Jesus Christ started to circulate, the story of Horus had been circulating for centuries. And it’s remarkably similar to a certain bearded, loin clothed son of god. Horus was born unto a virgin and was hailed as the son of the god, Osiris. His mother, Isis-Meri (Mary) and his father Jo-Seph (Joseph) welcomed his birth in a cave (as was Jesus). His birth was announced by angels and witnessed by shepherds and was later witnessed by 3 solar deities (Wise Men). There is no known record for either Horus or Jesus from the age of 12 until 30 when they were both said to have been baptized. They both had 12 disciples, walked on water, cast out demons, healed the sick, and restored sight to the blind. I could go on and on with the similarities, literally. There are a LOT of them, but I think you get the point. By the way, did you know that the story of Jesus didn’t start being told until 300 years AFTER he died? What was the hold up? I mean, who dropped the ball on that one?

I honestly believe that Jesus never existed. I have almost zero reason to think otherwise. He’s as real as Santa Clause and Kim Kardashian. God on the other hand, I don’t believe there is one, buuuuut, I don’t deny the possibility of one. The universe is a wondrous place full of things we don’t yet understand. I do believe in aliens, which is something these religious types have trouble swallowing, because I see facts that they could exist. I also believe they have visited us. Before the alleged Roswell crash in 1947, our most advanced piece of technology was the steam engine. Fast forward a few years and we had NASA and put a fucking man on the moon. I put my belief in science and hardcore facts. But, if there is in fact a god and Jesus was real and the story I chalk up to as a myth is in fact true, then I’m without a doubt going to hell. And when I do, I won’t be mad, cuz I’ll have you to keep me company. See you there. :)

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Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

This is one EPIC blog dude!

"I'm heading to Dunkin Donuts to grab a Mocha-Chocka-Latte-YaYa and grabbing a paper from the gas station and coming home to fire one off. This is gonna be one EPIC morning!"

Really? That sounds like a regular morning to me. One that doesn't deserve excitement or praise. Here's another:

"Dude, I bet my friend $5 on the football game last night. I won! It was so EPIC!!"

Sure it was. It sounds it. Cuz when I think of the word "epic" I think of the smallest most mundane bullshit I can to associate with the word. Cuz that's what the word has been reduced to. Next to nothing.

I can understand expressing excitement for mundane shit that makes you happy when you got nothing else going on, I get it. But to drag a word like "epic" into it is just plain sillyness. Taking a shit can be epic, if said shit takes more than 20 minutes to release and you can infact keep said shit intact enough to where it sticks up out of the toilet or wraps around the toilet like a coiled up snake and clogs the toilet so much that it takes a hazmat team to tame the beast to go down, yes, that would be one epic shit. But chances are, that's not gonna happen every morning.

"Dude, we all went to the bar last night and got so drunk and played darts. I missed the board so many times dude. It was so EPIC!"

What happens if you went to the bar, met these 5 hot chicks who shoved you in a limo, ripped off your clothes and theirs, showered you with whip cream and then began to lick it off all while watching the lottery numbers on the little tv to find out you just won 200 million dollars? Would that be epic? Would you be willing to use the same word to describe that evening that you use to describe the cereal you eat for breakfast? I seriously hope not.

Here's one more that I heard the other day:

"I tried to make a smiley face on my hamburger with my ketchup. EPIC FAIL!"

Funny. That's the same words I used when your mom gave birth to you.

Feels good to get that off my chest. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go take a shower and have some breakfast. It's gonna be one AVERAGE DAY!

Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item over 1 year ago

Dear Upper Class Snobby Assholes,

So I was watching the Today show last week, don't ask me why, when this complete douchebag in his tight suit and tie was on the air complaining about the new flavor of Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream, Schweddy Balls (named from the famous Alec Baldwin SNL sketch) and I haven't been able to get this whiny asshole's comments out of my head.

For anyone who didn't catch this clown on the Today show, here's what basically went down. There was a panel of 2 girls and 1 guy, all in their middle ages and I'm not sure of the 2 girls but the guy was a father. He said he was "offended" at the new product because he "didn't want to have to explain to his kid what it meant" and he believed it should be pulled from the shelves, shame on the company, let's all boycott, blah blah blah.

I really would love to give this fuck a piece of my mind along with all these other parents who want the entire country to raise their kids so they can play golf, cheat on their spouse, bake shitty cakes for the school bake sale, finger their anus during Nancy Grace, etc.. Where the fuck do you people get off? This is coming from the parent of 2 children, get a fucking life! If you don't like something, turn your fucking head! The whole world doesn't have to not have a sense of humor cuz you weren't born with one. How about being a good parent and raising your child to your ridiculous standards and take responsibility for what your child sees and doesn't see.

If this is so offensive, then maybe don't drag your kid to the local supermarket, march over to the ice cream aisle and point with your iron finger at the product while screaming "bad!" and "wrong!". As a parent I would say the sollution is simple if my kid sees something like this. Explain to them that it was named after a famous man named Pete Schweddy who makes delicious chocolate balls. Simple, effective, non offensive and true.

Instead of making your way to the NBC studios and going on the air complaining, maybe take that time to be a parent to your child. Explain the world to them in a way they can understand and take the time to make sure they become the well rounded, stuck up individuals you hope they will be. Stop expecting everyone else to be their role model and be it yourself. Let the rest of us have these little things that make us giggle and smile and stop trying to ruin it.

Sincerely yours,
Reality

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Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item almost 2 years ago

My inFamous/inFamous 2 Casting Call

Ben Foster as Cole

Tyler Labine as Zeke

Doug Jones as Kessler

Rose Byrne as Sasha

Danielle Harris as Trish

Tobin Bell as Alden

Michael Jai White as John White

Kate Beckinsale as Kuo

Naomie Harris as Nix

Willem Dafoe as Bertrand

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Sylar Victim #420 posted a BLOG item about 2 years ago

Douchebags.

So my new neighbors are the biggest fucking tools I have ever seen. They're these cocky, obnoxious college dudes who drink and party all fucking night and disturb my beauty sleep. So this morning I did what any self respecting asshole would do, got up early and faced my TV toward the ajoining wall and blasted some rocking 80's tunes and left the room for an hour or so. After I felt I made my point and turned it down, a little bit later I can hear this tool playing his acoustic guitar and singing some craptastic jam he wrote. And it reminded me of this clip:

Whilst perusing youtube for said video, I found an asston of clips of douchebags just like the one in the clip and just like my neighbor who posted videos of themselves singing the song. I thought to myself, "Self, do these fucking clowntards really think they're being funny? They couldn't possibly not see that they're the very people the clip is poking fun at, right? I mean, it's so ridiculously obvious that they couldn't possibly think they are being funny by re-enacting a joke that targets them. Do they think they're cool by being the exact person they're being made fun of for being? Or maybe they think the clip is not so much of a slam against them as it is an ode to how awesome they are. Maybe. I mean, they do drink alot of Budweiser, or MGD, or whatever drink they think is cool. Mike's Hard Lemonade maybe."

On a related topic, last week I walked outside to grab the mail and saw an empty beer can and a pair of men's boxer briefs laying in my driveway. Jesus, I know I'm currently in HillBillyBurg but damn, I just don't see how that's ok, scattering your driveway with what I assume you consider "lawn ornaments". God I can't wait to get the fuck outta here....