1. The Cincinnati Bengals winning the Super Bowl.
2. Chloe Bennet and I become an item.
3. Half-Life 3 gets released.
4. Curve reunites.
5. Netlix cancels Adam Sandler's contract.
6. Dale Earnhardt Jr. wins a championship.
7. Donald Trump apologizes.
8. Family Guy ends gracefully.
9. *insert something funny*