~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Spoilers~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ No, seriously. I'm gonna spoil some stuff in this movie. Don't read this. Scroll up. Or down. Or all around. Whatever makes you feel good. (Ew) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ...

This review is going to be shit. You know when you see a film that fully engrosses you and touches upon so many topics that your mind is reeling both from the events that happen within the film and the memories its stirring up from your own life? ...

Iron Man has never connected with me for some reason. I don't actively dislike the character, as is the case with Superman, but I don't grab onto him in the same way that I do, say Batman or the X-Men. Admittedly, these movies aren't my thing. ...

This movie is getting a five out of ten because of James Franco. Yeah, you read that right. I can't believe I'm saying that either. Hell hath officially frozen over. The movie opens with something like a Noxzema commercial (what up, Clueless). ...

First of all, Lays of Ancient Rome?? I can't believe that's a thing. When it first popped up on screen, I was like, LOLWUT. Because I'm educated and shit. YEAH. Anyway. Well. This movie had me sold for about an hour. Its different (at fi...

Yeah, I just gave this movie a 7. You wanna fight about it? It is pretty by the numbers but there's a lot of talent involved. Um, first of all, anything where Stanley Tucci is involved? Sign me the fuck up. Twice. Also, what's her face is good ...

Welp. Here it is. March is a wasteland when it comes to new releases and I've been waiting for this one out of 1) previously mentioned New Releases boredom and 2) being a huge, huge fan of the original. I have to say that I've read people...

Denzel Washington. Denzelllllllllll. Hoo buddy. The man just delivers great performance after great performance. I don't always feel like he's given the best material to work with, but goddamn does he make it work. I almost, almosttttt, feel like ...

Not at all what I expected. For some reason I thought this was going to be something grander, but it ends up being more of a personal story that touches upon the fraud and crime of the upper class and the lengths at which the legal system is willi...

SHOUT OUT TO MY LAPTOP FOR BEING AN EPIC PIECE OF SHIT AND SHUTTING DOWN WHILE I WAS WRITING A LENGTHY AND MUCH BETTER WRITTEN REVIEW. MAD PROPS FOR THAT, DELL. SEE YOU ASSHOLES IN HELL. Ok. Anyway. The plot description is in no wa...

It's weird. Because of his work as a playwright, I always know Martin Mcdonagh's stuff is going to be good but I can never manage to muster very much excitement for his movies for some reason. That's my fookin' mistake. Not many movies star...

Wow. Really unexpected reaction towards this film. I went in expecting to love it and I have to say, I disliked a lot of it. I know. I KNOW. Wut. For some reason, for the first 15 minutes or so, the way the exposition was dealt with really both...

Its not good, its not bad, this movie is just kind of there. Its the kind of movie you watch and forget about the next day. Helen Mirren and Anthony Hopkins really elevate the whole movie. (But they can't do all the work. The script is mostly weak...

Why.

I don't even know where to start. First off, this is a great film. That Tarantino could make a good follow-up to a fantastic movie like Inglorious Basterds is a testament to his skill as a writer/director. I kind of hate saying that though, be...

i'm not even going to bash this because at this point, old hat. MTV DOESN'T PLAY MUSIC VIDEOS ANYMORE EITHER WOAHHHH RADICALLLL and i'm not going to insult stephanie meyer because somehow this lady got what is essentially fanfiction put on the ...

this movie is bad, you guise. so bad. like troll 2 bad i'm convinced paul dano based his performance of eli from TWBB on this isaac kid (srsly. go watch a clip) he who walks behind the rows= he who smokes a lot of dope like i can't even ...

I mean, wow. I had fond memories of this movie but I didn't remember how fucked up it was. From the father and son "bonding", the scene on the porch,to the parents paying the bus driver (didn't remember that either), etc, some messed up crap ha...

Doesn't really mess anything up but doesn't really add anything new either. The absence of a director like Sam Raimi leaves this movie at a loss in terms of visual flair and sense of wonder. The one thing that I will praise are the onscreen...