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Cinenerd
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Infant Schmoe
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Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

2012



2009-two_thousand_twelve-1

Directed by: Roland Emmerich
Written by: Roland Emmerich, Harald Kloser
Cast: John Cusack, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Danny Glover, Amanda Peet, Thandie Newton, Oliver Platt
Studio: Sony Pictures
Genre: Action
Official Site: www.whowillsurvive2012.com
Plot: It's The End Of The World As We Know It But With John Cusack I Feel Fine

Review:

If you’re going to bring the world to and end, or make any kind of disaster flick in general, it needs to be big, dumb and most of all, fun. The emphasis should always be on the word fun. Let that be a lesson to you Hollywood hotshots. This includes Bay, McG and Sommers...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Jabronze (8/10) , Jack The Narrator (5/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

The Boat that Rocked



2009-boat_that_rocked-1

Directed by: Richard Curtis
Written by: Richard Curtis
Cast: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Rhys Ifans, Nick Frost, Kenneth Branagh, Tom Sturridge, Jack Davenport, Ralph Brown, Chris O'Dowd, January Jones
Studio: Focus Features
Genre: Comedy
Official Site:
Plot: When This Boat's A-Rockin' You'll Wish You Could Come A-Knockin'

Review:

I remember the first time I watched a Richard Curtis film. I was 14 years old and I sat down with my grandma to watch a little film called “Four Weddings and a Funeral” which then went on to receive a Best Picture nod. I have always been just as interested in who made a movie as much as the final product...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: ThePood (7/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

The Fourth Kind



Fourth-kind-poster5

Directed by: Olatunde Osunsanmi
Written by: Olatunde Osunsanmi
Cast: Milla Jovovich, Elias Koteas, Will Patton
Studio: Universal Pictures
Genre: Science-Fiction
Official Site: www.thefourthkind.net
Plot: "The Fourth Kind" Is Called The Worst Kind... Just Like This Movie

Review:

With a long history behind it, sci-fi films don’t always have to deal with alien abduction. Amongst a wide range of quality, some are silly (“Men in Black” and “The Arrival”) or have been offered up for television (the James Earl Jones starring “The UFO Incident,” Spielberg’s “Taken,” the controversial “Alien Autopsy: Fact or Fiction,” and the “X-Files,” along with both the original and current “V” miniseries...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: director1990 (6/10) , LonzellJ (8/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

Disney's A Christmas Carol



Christmas-carol-poster111

Directed by: Robert Zemeckis
Written by: Robert Zemeckis
Cast: Jim Carrey, John Cleese, Gary Oldman, Alan Rickman, William H. Macy, Cary Elwes, Colin Firth, Bob Hoskins, Robin Wright Penn
Studio: Walt Disney Pictures
Genre: Animation
Official Site: www.disney.com/christmascarol
Plot: Another Holiday Season, Another Zemekis Mess

Review:

Oh, how I love a good Christmas film and there are lots to choose from when the season roles around every year. Starting on Nov. 1 is when I typically begin letting the season’s music start jingling in my ears. When it comes to picking which ones to watch every year there are standards, the non-traditional and then there are the unintentional...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Otis_Driftwood (3/10) , MattSlash (8/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

Gentlemen Broncos



Gentlemen-broncos-poster1

Directed by: Jared Hess
Written by: Jared Hess, Jerusha Hess
Cast: Michael Angarano, Jennifer Coolidge, Jemaine Clement, Mike White, Sam Rockwell
Studio: Fox Searchlight
Genre: Comedy
Official Site: www.foxsearchlight.com/gentlemenbroncos/
Plot: Those Local Yokels Are Back For More... This Time With Sam Rockwell and Snake Poop!

Review:

With only three directing jobs under his belt now, Jared Hess, working with his wife, screenwriter Jerusha Hess, has managed to make three very separately unique films even if instantly recognizable to the viewer. Bursting onto the scene in 2004 with the indie darling “Napoleon Dynamite” he managed to make loveable losers a household name. After that exploded he moved on to working with another friend he made along the way Jack Black and popped out “Nacho Libre.”...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: filmguy450 (2/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

This Is It



This-is-it-poster

Directed by: Kenny Ortega
Written by: N/A
Cast: Michael Jackson
Studio: Sony
Genre: Musical, Concert
Official Site: www.sonypictures.com/movies/michaeljacksonthisisit/
Plot: "This Is It?" Thankfully It's More Than You'd Think

Review:

I have never been a big fan of Michael Jackson. That could be considered offensive to say in a review of a film put together so soon after his death. As a child of the ‘80s however, I am fully aware of the icon the man truly is. My parents weren’t fans and neither are any of my friends from that time period. All I really have known about the man is that he is mostly referred to as “The King of Pop” and has about a “million” hit singles played regularly on the radio or at Halloween parties...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: VANDY PRICE (10/10) , MattSlash (10/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

Astro Boy



2009-astro_boy-1

Directed by: David Bowers
Written by: Timothy Harris
Cast: Nicolas Cage, Freddie Highmore, Kristen Bell, Bill Nighy, Donald Sutherland, Nathan Lane
Studio: Summit Entertainment
Genre: Animation
Official Site: www.astroboy-themovie.com
Plot: Astro Boy? More Like Astro Turd As Another Bastardized Comic Adaptation Hits the Big Screen

Review:

With the current releases of “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs” and Pixar’s “Toy Story” 3-D double feature you could assume that a major studio release of yet another CG-animated film would be a bad idea. If the quality could match either of those two releases one would be wrong. That Summit Entertainment has unleashed such a gross misappropriation of expectations would be an understatement...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Jack The Narrator (7/10) , tbondrage99 (5/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant



Vampire-assistant-poster1

Directed by: Paul Weitz
Written by: Brian Helgeland, Paul Weitz
Cast: John C. Reilly, Ken Watanabe, Josh Hutcherson, Chris Massoglia, Ray Stevenson, Patrick Fugit, Orlando Jones, Willem Dafoe, Salma Hayek
Studio: Universal Pictures
Genre: Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy, Horror
Official Site: www.thevampiresassistant.net
Plot: Come One, Come All, Freaks Unleash The Funny While "The Vampire's Assistant" Gets His Training

Review:

When it comes to famous directing siblings, perhaps the first names that spring to mind are either the kings of gross Farrelly brothers (“Dumb and Dumber,” “There’s Something About Mary,” “Stuck on You” and “Fever Pitch”) or the Academy Award winning team the Coen brothers (“Blood Simple”, “Raising Arizona,” “Fargo,” “No Country for Old Men,” and “Burn After Reading”...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Hubbs (5/10) , Cochise (2/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

Law Abiding Citizen



2009-law_abiding_citizen_-1

Directed by: F. Gary Gray
Written by: Kurt Wimmer
Cast: Gerard Butler, Jamie Foxx, Leslie Bibb, Michael Gambon, Viola Davis, Regina Hall, Bruce McGill
Studio: Overture Films
Genre: Thriller
Official Site: www.lawabidingcitizenfilm.com
Plot: Too Much Dick Wolf Makes For The Worst Kind Of Saw-Induced Version Of A Dark Knight Ripoff

Review:

In coming up with the idea for Kurt Wimmer’s latest screenplay offering, apparently he sat down for a triple feature consisting of “Law & Order,” “The Dark Knight” and any of the first five “Saw” films. But when a screenwriter’s only good movie is the Christian Bale starring “Equilibrium” maybe studios should start second guessing his writing duties...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: VANDY PRICE (8/10) , Jack The Narrator (10/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: about 2 years ago

Where The Wild Things Are



Where-the-wild-things-are-poster5

Directed by: Spike Jonze
Written by: Spike Jonze, Dave Eggers
Cast: Catherine Keener, Max Records, James Gandolfini, Angus Sampson, Forest Whitaker, Lauren Ambrose, Catherine O'Hara, Rachel Rivera, Melissa Davis, Paul Dano
Studio: Warner Bros
Genre: Adventure
Official Site: wherethewildthingsare.warnerbros.com
Plot: The Classic Children's Picture Book, "Where the Wild Things Are," Comes Roaring To Glorious Life

Review:

Spike Jonze has been MIA for seven years in the movie scene. However, he has come back with a vengeance and delivered one of the most brilliant family films about being a young boy on the cusp of finally having to grow up. After author Maurice Sendak saw Jonze’s breakout film “Being John Malkovich” it was then that Sendak knew who should adapt his own children’s book and since then audiences had no idea what to expect from a live action version of “Where the Wild Things Are.”...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: BabuBhaut (10/10) , drc5145 (9/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Couples Retreat



Couples-retreat-poster1

Directed by: Peter Billingsley
Written by: Jon Favreau, Vince Vaughn, Dana Fox
Cast: Vince Vaughn, Jason Bateman, Jon Favreau, Faizon Love, Kristin Davis, Malin Akerman, Kristen Bell, Kali Hawk, Jean Reno
Studio: Universal Pictures
Genre: Comedy
Official Site: www.couplesretreatmovie.com
Plot: A week in paradise? How hard could it be?

Review:

Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau are great friends. This is very apparent as they have now starred in five films together since their original collaboration “Swingers” back in 1996 and its unintentional sequel “Made.” Along the way they have made a pretty good friendship with little Ralphie Parker himself (“A Christmas Story”), Peter Billingsley. He has appeared with them both in the boring-except-when-Vaughn-and-Favreau-are-on-screen-together “The Break-Up,” joined them in last year’s “Four Christmases” along with small roles in Favreau’s own “Elf” and “Iron Man” and now the trio bring us “Couples Retreat.”...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Shaggy89 (6/10) , VANDY PRICE (6/10) > Display all
JoBlo
JoBlo at 04:13 PM Oct 08

Good review. Seems most critics are KILLING IT though, weird: http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/couples_retreat/. My girlfriend LOVED it!

J.A_Hamilton
J.A_Hamilton at 05:08 PM Oct 21

Great review, the film doesn't deserve all the bashing it's getting.

Jack The Narrator
Jack The Narrator at 02:04 AM Nov 06

I don't think Malin Ackerman looks ANYTHING like Cameron Diaz.

Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Zombieland



Zombieland-poster

Directed by: Ruben Fleischer
Written by: Rhett Reese, Paul Wernick
Cast: Woody Harrelson, Jesse Eisenberg, Emma Stone, Amber Heard, Abigail Breslin
Studio: Sony Pictures
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Official Site: www.zombieland.com
Plot: When the world is overtaken with zombies what do you do? Hit up the ol' amusement park of course... Cali here we come!

Review:

In the annals of zombie movies there’s definitely a broad share of the good, the bad and the ugly. It may not be my favorite sub-genre of horror but I do enjoy my fair share of the undead rising from death to munch on hapless passersby. Whether it be straight out horror to the occasionally played as thriller to the outright loving spoof, there’s a great many variety when it comes to these types of films...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: drc5145 (8/10) , The Mad German (9/10) > Display all
J.A_Hamilton
J.A_Hamilton at 05:08 PM Oct 21

LOVE this movie.

Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Whip It!



Whip-it-poster

Directed by: Drew Barrymore
Written by: Shauna Cross
Cast: Ellen Page, Drew Barrymore, Juliette Lewis, Kristen Wiig, Marcia Gay Harden, Zoe Bell, Jimmy Fallon
Studio: Fox Searchlight
Genre: Comedy
Official Site: www.foxsearchlight.com/whipit/
Plot: Drew Barrymore makes a crowd pleasing splash in her directing debut

Review:

WHIP IT...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: BabuBhaut (8/10) , MattSlash (7/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Toy Story in 3-D



Toy-story1-3d

Directed by: John Lasseter
Written by:
Cast: Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Don Rickles, Jim Varney, Wallace Shawn, John Ratzenberger
Studio: Walt Disney/Pixar
Genre: Animation
Official Site: disney.go.com/toystory
Plot: The toys are back and shinier than ever!

Review:

If we are to fully believe in the hope for 3-D animation it comes directly from the hands of Pixar. While “Up” didn’t manage to satiate my belief it has now come to term with their re-release of the original “Toy Story” films. Lately there has been a glutton of 3-D films. While none in the live-action arena have given leeway in hope, the cinematic gimmick of yesteryear now has legs to stand on. This isn’t saying Pixar is the only production company capable of producing fine 3-D films in either format. Simply put, live-action films have characters and props looking like they’re placed in front of cardboard cutout sets while CG animation manages to fully immerse with added depth and clarity...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Peandpi (10/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Surrogates



2009-surrogates-1

Directed by: Jonathan Mostow
Written by: Michael Ferris, John Brancato
Cast: Bruce Willis, Radha Mitchell, Rosamund Pike, Boris Kodjoe, Jack Noseworthy, Ving Rhames
Studio: Touchstone Pictures
Genre: Science-Fiction
Official Site: www.chooseyoursurrogate.com
Plot: In a world where no one lives their own lives, what could go wrong?

Review:

I freely admit it; I’m a big fan of director Jonathan Mostow. But sometimes you can feel a director slipping with each film and I really hope that with some more films under his belt and his name back in the writer’s credit he can get himself back on track. With his first theatrical outing he brought us a spectacular little film called “Breakdown” starring Kurt Russel and Kathleen Quinlan in a fight for survival along the highways of the back roads. This was co-written with the same writer he teamed up for to give us “U-571” (Sam Montgomery) which brought bigger stars along with it such as Matthew McConaughey, Bill Paxton, Harvey Keitel, and Jon Bon Jovi. It was a very claustrophobic and intense film that almost completely takes place under water and within in confines of a submarine yet managed to be gripping and interesting all the way through which is a big deal for a guy who has no normal interest in the war genre...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: gabrielg (5/10) , VANDY PRICE (7/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Big Fan



Big-fan-poster

Directed by: Robert Siegel
Written by: Robert Siegel
Cast: Patton Oswalt, Kevin Corrigan, Marcia Jean Kurtz, Michael Rapaport, Gino Cafarelli
Studio: First Independent Pictures
Genre: Drama
Official Site: www.bigfanmovie.com
Plot: How far do you go to keep your team afloat when your idol beats you senseless in a strip club?

Review:

Sports are definitely something that I have very slowly become a little bit more of a fan of over the years. For a very long time the only game I was ever a fan of happened to be baseball with my favorite team being the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. I’m not sure exactly why they’re my team of choice but it could be that they’re the parent team to my local Triple A affiliate the Salt Lake Bees. I am far from what one would call a big fan and some who know me are usually very surprised that I even have a slight interest in any sports team. I even have a super-secret superhero character I made up back in the day that goes by the name “Anti-Sports Guy” so obviously I’m the last person who should like sports films...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: BakeTheMooCow (5/10) , dsloy (7/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

The Informant



2009-informant-1

Directed by: Steven Soderbergh
Written by: Scott Z. Burns
Cast: Matt Damon, Scott Bakula, Joel McHale, Melanie Lynskey
Studio: Warner Bros.
Genre: Comedy, Drama
Official Site: theinformantmovie.warnerbros.com
Plot:

Review:

Matt Damon and Steven Soderbergh have each made very different films over the years and Damon has now been in five of Soderbergh's. Soderbergh is more known for his bigger titles such as “Erin Brockovich,” “Traffic,” and the “Oceans” trilogy but that may be about it. While two of those five were Oscar nominated, Soderbergh is probably much more well known within the indie art house crowds. From his debut film “Sex, Lies and Videotape” which played as part of the 1989 Sundance Film Festival in my local Park City, thru films such as “Out of Sight,” “The Limey,” “Full Frontal,” “Solaris,” “Bubble,” and parts “One” and “Two” of the “Che” films along with his most recent “The Girlfriend Experience” starring adult film star Sasha Grey...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: Craigstra (5/10) , BabuBhaut (8/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

9



2009-nine-1

Directed by: Shane Acker
Written by: Pamela Pettler
Cast: Elijah Wood, Jennifer Connelly, Martin Landau, Christopher Plummer, John C. Reilly
Studio: Focus Features
Genre: Animated
Official Site: www.9themovie.com
Plot: Can a group of dolls fend off the machines and refurbish the humans? Who cares...

Review:

When it comes to computer-animated feature films, there are some who get it and some who do not. There also happen to be some who are stuck in the middle and have great ideas, compelling visuals but still manage to skimp on the story in favor of getting to the next action sequence. The same tends to go along with the big dumb action movies of summer. When your new computer-animated feature film feels the need to be one of those movies it deserves to be released in the dump days of September. Marketing executives also must have thought they’d struck the ultimate goldmine when a film is called “9” as they have the even more ultimate release date of 9/9/09. However, it’s a good thing the movie is as loud and obnoxious as it is to keep you awake when the screening you attend also happens to be at 9:09 p.m...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: darkvampire (7/10) , filmguy450 (5/10) > Display all
Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

The Final Destination



2009-final_destination-1

Directed by: David R. Ellis
Written by: Eric Bress
Cast: Bobby Campo, Shantel VanSanten, Hayley Webb, Nick Zano, Mykelti Williamson, Krista Allen, Andrew Fiscella
Studio: New Line Cinema
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Official Site: www.thefinaldestinationmovie.com
Plot: Death kicks it up a notch and bathes us with bloodshed in g(l)orious 3-D

Review:

When the original “Final Destination” was released back in 2000 it had a few scenes that literally made me forget to breathe. From the opening plane crash to a character getting squashed like a bug by a bus I could sense that I had found my new favorite horror series outside of the “Scream” trilogy. The Rube Goldbergesque setups ending with a character going splat was truly horrifying yet so utterly silly that it was always hilarious...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: TravmacDaddy (6/10) , Film Fan BeAm2k (4/10) > Display all
Matthew Pattinson
Matthew Pattinson at 02:17 PM Aug 22

Hey,

Great review, enjoyed the read. You make some interesting points but I have to say I found Final Destination 4 about as limp as a dead fish. My review of the movie is at total loggerheads with yours.

Each to their own, of course! It's always good to hear different opinions.

Totally agree with you on the first instalment, though. It's peppered with moments of true originaility.

thanks again

Matt

Cinenerd posted a MOVIE REVIEW item: over 2 years ago

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen



2009-transformers_revenge_of_the_fallen-1

Directed by: Michael Bay
Written by: Alex Kurtzman, Roberto Orci, Ehren Kruger
Cast: Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Rainn Wilson, Tyrese, Josh Duhamel, Isabel Lucas
Studio: Paramount Pictures
Genre: Action
Official Site: www.transformersmovie.com
Plot: Everything Bay is brash ten fold in the sequel to a big, dumb action movie that should've stayed true to its own formula

Review:

What has two balls and sucks more sand than a David Hasselhoff wannabe? Michael Bay...[more]...

Other reviews of this film: IwishIwasBond (5/10) , Crazy Dud (4/10) > Display all
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